How to Bargain?
- Christelle Pillot
- Jan 16, 2023
- 3 min read
Updated: Jan 23, 2023
Negotiation is an important skill to have in both personal and professional settings. It allows us to effectively communicate our needs and reach mutually beneficial agreements with others.
In our personal lives, we use negotiation skills to resolve conflicts with friends or family or to make decisions about shared resources. Negotiation is crucial to everyday operations, as it allows companies to reach agreements with clients, vendors, and partners.

Four steps for an excellent negotiation
The search for methods to resolve conflicts dates back to around 1950. Since then, various models for better conflict resolution have been researched and tested.
A well-known research center on conflict resolution worked on the "Harvard negotiation project."
The concept that this center developed at Harvard University emphasizes that negotiations should not be based on positions.
The method breaks down as follows:
1- Treat the people's issues and the dispute separately
2- Focus on the interests at stake and not on the positions
3- Imagine solutions for mutual benefit
4- Require the use of objective criteria
Separate the people's issues from the dispute
Negotiators are, first and foremost, men and women. Each one comes with emotional baggage: their certainties, convictions, and fears.
The negotiator's interest is twofold: on the one hand, one negotiates to serve one's interests, but on the other hand, one is always interested in pursuing one's relationship with the opponent.
Human problems must be dealt with fearlessly and straightforwardly. Being at the heart of the discussion while continuing good relations with one's opponent is not necessarily contradictory, provided that one is committed and psychologically prepared to dissociate these issues to resolve them objectively.
You have to put yourself in the opponent's shoes. One should not think of the opponent as an enemy or a friend. An adversary is there to advance a project and defend a viewpoint.
2. Focus on the interests at stake and the basic needs, not on positions.
Finding a sensible solution requires interests to be reconciled, not positions.
Therefore, ask why the opponent maintains their position.
Anecdote (from the book: "getting to yes")
Two sisters want the last orange in the basket. After a big fight, they agree to share the orange. The first sister removes the skin from her half of the orange and eats the pulp. The second sister pulls the peel from her half, uses the peel to make her cake, and throws away the pulp.
The position was: I want the orange.
The interest is: eating the pulp for one and using the peel for the other. They could have found a better agreement if they had been interested not in the position but in the "why" of this position.
Understand that each party has more than one interest at stake. Try to discover your interests.
Basic human requirements often dictate interests. These play the most crucial role. What are these needs: security? Economic well-being? Authority? Mastery of one's destiny, etc.

3 . Imagining solutions for mutual benefit
We must remain open and creative. Criticism and hasty judgments are the first two obstacles to the imagination.
Take your time before making a decision.
The self-interested negotiator has an attitude that will not allow him to imagine satisfactory solutions.
4. Demand the use of objective criteria
When arguments are put forward, questions such as
"What are you basing your arguments on?
or "What evidence do you have to support your position?"
can be helpful in bringing the conversation back to objective criteria. By focusing on objective criteria, both parties can avoid getting caught up in subjective opinions and emotions, and instead base their arguments on factual information and evidence. This can help make the negotiation process more rational and fair, and increase the chances of reaching a mutually beneficial agreement. Using objective criteria can help establish trust and credibility between the parties, as it demonstrates a commitment to reason and evidence rather than personal interests or biases.
Negotiation is also a key component of leadership and management. Leaders must be able to negotiate with their teams and other stakeholders to achieve shared goals and make critical decisions.
Effectively negotiating can lead to better relationships, increased efficiency, and improved outcomes. Whether resolving a personal disagreement or closing a business deal, strong negotiation skills are essential to our success.
Using these methods, negotiation can be fun and effortless. Try it and tell me how it goes.
My Genius Plan gives participants these:
A strong plan. ✔
A strong mindset.🧠
A strong community.🤝
Send me a message to get a link to the program.
Many women have complimented me on my job-fit questionnaire.
If you have not tried it book a free call to get a job-fit assessment.
We discuss results together to see how your current job fare.
BOOK A CALL to see your score!
Yorumlar